The Chaff

Animals on Bikes

Tracy Middleton

Joe Raso

Ben Allcorn

 

Brendan Lea

 

David Murray

Roadkill 

Actually that's not true because Chris was very strong in the ride he and I did to Cumnock and back yesterday . The main feature of this ride besides Chris and his blistering pace was the amazing sculptures along the way .

We thought the first sculpture was a one off but when they kept coming , clearly something was going on .

Animals on bikes is an art installation from Dubbo to Molong featuring sculptures made by farmers , their wives and also their children . It is fantastic , the above photos I took myself on the way and I also include a couple more from the website animalsonbikes.com.au . Check it out .

Chris will love this one !

Everyone will love this one !

AllCost Invitational

Here's hoping we have more days like the 28th Nov just passed , sure I lost but there was a lot to like about the whole deal .

Firstly the interest generated was great and has gone some way to rekindling the bike riding culture at Manildra after the recent upheavals .

So for starters we have a new Yellow Jersey . He was that good ! 

Ben Allcorn has stepped up and the previous holder of the Jersey is looking over his shoulder .

Here he is as cool as a cucumber just after the finish line . It's kind of bittersweet , I hate him for beating me but I'm rapt we have a gun rider for the MMRT . 

As for the rest of the team , I am privileged to ride with Chris Gue  , he is a very selfless person who gave of himself to both the participants . He trained with both of us and was a great sounding board for same . 

Roland Gruneis from Austria brought his bike with him to Australia . His bike is a Bianchi which means white in Italian . He is already a true Man In White , he really helped bring me up to speed (nearly) for the race . He actually came out to Manildra twice to ride the route with me as well as several training rides round Orange .

Here is Roland with Paul Potter who sacrificed some of his Saturday to drive behind us and protect us from the traffic . He did a great job but he wouldn't have been happy watching me go down . He is my Lead Miller and Man In White . Thanks for the effort Paul and I promise I'll work extra hard Monday morning . 

The heavy dudes ponder the result . Look guys I did my best .........!

You'll be back on the Packers next week Paddy !

Joe Raso was there . He came out at 9am rode the route in I hour 20 and then watched us race . He had beers with us afterwards . He is a true member of the MMRT . 

About the race itself , I was confident I felt I was a real chance . I had done the work .

I knew Ben would kill me over the first ten kays so I set out to limit my losses . It looked dire but I caught him at Cudal and I was now hopeful everything was on track . We turned the monument together and I made my move , I whizzed past him and went for it .

Ben changed up and stuck with me , I think from that point on I was gone .

The vanquished has one request . Please Ben make an AllCost trophy , make it a good one . 

The Race Day Approaches

The race is on and Renee has won . A baby daughter is the prize and The Chaff wishes the best for Pippa and the new parents . 

It's been a while for me now but I do recall sleepless nights and the rest , every new parent goes through this . I hope Ben experiences this fully and really appreciates this time in his life . No doubt he will be great support to Renee . No time for anything else really .

Of course family and wellwishers will be around to celebrate this momentous occasion and Ben shouldn't hold back . Embrace the moment have a few beers , whisky champagne anything . It's not everyday one has a baby and if you see Ben at the pub , buy him a beer or two . 

From my part , I realize has Bens' commitments right now and for that reason , I have decided to ride my own bike in the race . Relieve the pressure on him you know . That way he can concentrate on the baby knowing I'm going to be riding my jalopy . No need to train anymore DAD . 

Truth is Brendans bike is way too sophisticated for me , I can't do justice to it in such a short time and anyway some guys have hinted to me that perhaps I am cheating riding the flash bike . Nigel in particular lived up to his nickname in pointing this out to me . 

So this leaves the race finely poised , Ben and I had a bit of a trial run a week or so ago , he surprised me with his strength and climbing ability . It was a bit cat and mouse but I probably just shaded him on fitness but I reckon there is nothing in it . It will come down to who handles the day better .

The tactics will be interesting on the day , will Ben take off ? Will I manage to stay with him for the first brutal climb ? If we are neck and neck at the end will Ben have enough to keep me at bay ? These questions and more will be answered this Saturday 28th Nov 2009 . The first AllCost Invitational . 

11am we take off from the railway crossing near the Bowlo ride to Cudal and then the Monument and back to Manildra to  finish at the second 60km sign before the roadworks . We will then have a couple of beers at the pub . This will be about 12.30pm . 

 

Bigger than Ben Hur

Ben Allcorn is doing my head in . 

He's going to pay on the 28th Nov . The first AllCost Invitational .

So named because one must win at all costs . 

I propose a regular event because the interest in this race is enormous . The winner to take on another challenger within three months . 

To those who are punting on me , whoa , that's a big responsibility . Steady on . I don't want to put people out of pocket .

On second thoughts put your house on it . 

I can't believe how competitive Allcorn is . He is a freak . Hats off to him I respect that . 

Really though , who did he think he was challenging ?  Some person who was going to roll over ?  

I'm not Jenny Craig . He can lose weight the hard way , eating my dust .

Admittedly when I accepted the challenge I didn't expect this level of intensity but it's bringing out the best in me and thank you to Ben for making me take the next step in my riding experience .

To those who are backing me , I don't promise to win ! But I will give it my best shot . I will leave nothing on the route or the bike . Yes the bike .........well I didn't expect Brendan to say yes , perhaps I put him on the spot . I don't know but it is a most generous gesture and I intend to take advantage of it .

You see it's serious , win at all cost because that is how Ben has framed it and that is how I'm going to respond . I've arranged for a sniper to shoot Ben in the leg as we pass the Monument , that's when I'm going to make my move .

That's my strategy , Carrera and Winchester !

Also before I forget , I have a message for Mrs Allcorn . 

Renee don't you think you need more support around the house at the moment ? Isn't Ben spending way too much time on his bike at the moment ? 

The thing is I'm worried about Mrs Allcorn all alone at home , fully pregnant , while the father of the story rides around like a maniac .  She should put a stop to it !

There are some things more important than a stupid bike race . I'm hearing you Renee . 

Bloody Big Bike

Ben Allcorn has changed the flavour of the next six weeks . 

He is training hard and certainly putting the pressure on . Well done Big Bike . 

Certainly I am shitting myself especially as my wing man is now riding with Ben Allcorn . Loyalty is cheap when it comes to this level of riding . 

I have been on holiday and will not ride much before the big race at the end of November and I'm getting my excuses in early . 

Allcorn maintains youth is the key . He is eighteen years younger than me . I have given him two months in which to get fit . He is a clear favourite and if you disagree you work in Party HQ

Really though he has given up smoking drinking and sex . It's only a race for Chrissakes !

Still I hope to beat him . Wish me luck . 

Remember this is for the Ben Allcorn weight loss program and you'll feel better about it !

I certainly do .

Because this signals the return of Ben into the MMRT and that is good . We need more riders to take on that unmentionable Mill in a grudge match . So Ben riding is terrific and a fillip for the riders in the MMRT . 

Sucked In Ben Allcorn

I couldn't believe my luck ! Big Bike Ben Allcorn saunters into the control room with all the arrogance that is associated with a Party HQ member , wakes me up , and proceeds to challenge me to a bike race . 

He needs two months to get fit he says , and then he is going to humiliate me for the pretender he reckons I am . You're nearly fifty he cackled , youth will win out . 

I'd been waiting for an opportunity to get a carton of beer back off Ben after he took one off me recently . This was it and I gleefully took it . You see Ben was taking candy off a baby when he won his bet and he took advantage of that . Now it's payback and I'm not going to be his motivation to get fit . Instead I'm going to milk it for all its worth untill I apply the coup de gras on the 27th November . 

Everyone is invited to the bloodletting . 

Ride with us , I want as many witnesses as possible !

To Ben ......so far none of your Party Animal friends are keen to back you . So much for loyalty eh ? 

The Men In White are lining up behind me !

Keep Riding

The Ghostrider

This image was placed on my bike sometime between 11pm and 5am at Mudgee during the Mill2Mill .

The creases are my doing because I folded the picture and kept it till now . I have a scanner now so I have uploaded the image to illustrate to other riders why I rode like a busted arse that day .

I was cursed by the Ghostrider as you can see .

Notice how the creases look like cross hairs of a rifle . Well that's how I wish I was looking at the Ghostrider through cross hairs .

Just a flesh wound , I don't want to kill him . He's too valuable a poster !

Ghost Rider's Revenge

Hi Pat , one fine day in Dubbo , meant to send this a month ago , but
here it is the Ghost Riders revenge , yes thats right Pat I took this
when you were taking a photo of Jim and Christine. Now that is spooky
Ha Ha Ha ??????????

 

The amusing thing about the Ghostrider is how he or she got me in Mudgee .

On the morning of the biggest leg 200km , I woke early , still dark I wondered outside to check the temperature . Our Bikes were stacked along the balcony which ran the length of the Motel . My bike however had a visual message from the Ghostrider stuck onto it  . I roared with surprise and woke everyone up to show them the evil image .

I took it down to breakfast and showed it to everyone . I then rode like a busted arse for the rest of the day . The bastard Ghostrider had struck again .

Things I've Learnt On This Ride

Don't fuck with John Campbell's cadence

Put lots of that anti chafing stuff in your nicks

Get close to the wheel in front of you

Don't grab onto the truck while it's moving and you are riding

Bill Peacock has the best looking bike and he painted it himself

Guns can mean something other than firearms

Women are gutsy riders

Kimbo is the man

Paddy Gibson has a brother

Brendan Lea and Bill Peacock are not in it for the glory .

Draino can actually ride

Dougo can actually ride

Mudgee is a great town

Coolah has a cool pub man

RSL clubs are really casinos

Beer is a great recovery drink . Thanks Muldoon

Cycling is all teamwork

Don't get caught in no mans land on your own

You save 30% of your energy slipstreaming , someone tell Joe Raso .

John Campbell can make a speech

Doctors and Accountants drink more than everyone else

When you're not in a car roadkill smells pretty bad

The Yellow Jersey is actually a mad snow skier

Catholic school principals swear like troopers

I'm not a gun

Those gels keep you up all night

Charity begins at home

Barry Bance is human  

200km is a bloody long way

The Men In White are not a joke

The calibre of your bike is not that important

The Ghostrider was on the ride

Indonesians deal with misfortune with great dignity

Singaporean women are absolutely stunning

Whizzing down a hill at 70km an hour is a huge buzz

Struggling up a hill at 12 km an hour sucks

My arse can hurt more than any other part of my bodies anatomy

Train drivers can cycle too

Riding bikes is cool

I'm a bike rider

Standing Start Barry Bance

Manildra Mills Riding Team

John Campbell

Brendan Lea

Bill Peacock

Wayne Gersbach

Dan Simmons

Jim Farr

Barry Bance

Tim from Indo

Ting Xie from Singapore

The Ghostrider

Pat Gibson's brother

Pat Gibson

Chris Gue

Gary Douglas

Mel Kiel

Tracy Middleton

Paul Potter

Jason Osborne

Joe Raso

Kimbo Smith

Patrick Cost-Chretien

There are more , like Charles and Brett , I just need to get the surnames right .

As you can see though the team is evolving and growing , there are no borders . It isn't confined to the Mill or the town or even the country .

Official Song Of The MiLL2Mill ?

 " Wide Open Road " by the Triffids .  

Official Joke for the Mill2Mill ?

A couple of blokes are tearing down the road , their legs spinning at 90rpm , as they take advantage of the slight downhill .

Suddenly a funeral procession appears a bit further on . Frantically the front rider applies both brakes and comes to a screeching halt .

 He dismounts , takes his helmet off and bows his head as the procession goes by .

His riding partner is dumbfounded ," mate I've known you all my life , been riding with you for most of that . But I've never seen you do anything like that before "

He replied

 Yeah , Well , we were married for 35 years .

Special School

Anson Street Special School is for special kids , who through no fault of their own , are in this world with serious disabilties that make normal life impossible for them and their parents and family .

Happily as a society , we engage this problem and provide schools to cater for these special ones . Anson Street School is one of these establishments and I doff my cap to everyone who works there .

If I am not mistaken , we have a couple of riders from this school who are to participate in the Mill2MIll . Hallelujah , I love this stuff . I will certainly spend time riding and supporting these wonderful individuals who are examples of what is possible when a community cares for those less fortunate .

I'd like to take this opportunity to highlight some of the other benefits flowing from the Mill2MIll . Of course Jane McGrath Foundation is a beneficiary . No need for elaboration there . Breast cancer takes mothers away from their children . Great to see women riding in this event .

The other main charity is the Lions Club in Manildra and funds accrued , will go towards old age accommodation in Manildra . Oldies tend to get forgotten about in the twilight of their lives and here we have some action on that front .

Also when we stop for food and drink while riding from Gunnedah to Manildra , we will be supporting tiny schools that lie along the way . Funds for their P & F , to go towards the stuff that make these small regional schools tick over . Excursions , library facilities and general fundraising to benefit the little ones who represent our future . Glenn McGrath came from Narromine and he became an Australian Icon  . Small regional schools have long provided the champions and heroes of this country . 

Last but not least , let me celebrate the changes in the lives of the actual riders . For example , I now have a pastime that makes me healthier . Gary Dougo hasn't been this fit for years , Gue is honouring his legacy . Paul and Jason are reconnecting with their past , way back when they were elite athletes . All good positive stuff .

I have heard a couple of criticisms of the cost of the ride . My response is for them to get on a bike and do something good .

Also special mention to Nigel Livingstone , who when put under pressure to make the ride an issue , responded immediately with a measured response about the importance of charity . 

So Let's Ride !

Go Joe Raso

Here's to Joe Raso who has decided to take us on , in the Mill2Mill in a few weeks time . He's the only blue collar riding from the Mill . Of course Millers are blue collar as well , but our white uniform makes this problematic .

Anyway back to Joe who has morphed into a top notch rider . Out of nowhere , the sneaky bugger has appeared with plenty of form . I spotted him on Iceley Rd the other day and he looked very impressive riding his new bike . Especially as a couple of minutes later I spied Michael Caine labouring up the same road . This Hollywood actor might be suffering from too much riding .

He needs to relax , put his feet up , and get on the grog and hamburgers like the rest of us .

The organisation of the ride continues apace , in a big gear . With a massive tailwind to boot .

 A disclaimer has been provided to us . I hope my insurance is enough , mine covers 3 nights in a pub room recovering from alcohol poisoning . I would imagine that the Mill has their own cover for an event such as this .

I'm really concerned about liability for things like illegal gambling . For example , I have made a massive bet that Jason Osbourne will complete the whole ride . My opponent in this bet was so confident that Ozzie would not , he kept raising the stakes .

I tried to be sensible in the whole affair , after all , I can always marry again .

So  !  No pressure Jason .

I'm happy with the way Draino is approaching the ride , he's just going to lay down and let us all overtake , which is great for the Men in White . We need all the easybeats that we can get . Pacific National have a bloke who has only ridden 10km . This is manna from heaven .

Brendan Lea on the other hand is getting all serious with a full on session with a cycling witch doctor . He's playing hard to beat which is going to make it all the more satisfying when Gue smokes his ass .

No pressure Gue .

Now many long time readers may take this opportunity to remind me of some posts I wrote ages ago , about beating The Yellow Jersey into Manildra . Now I could plead drunkenness or reduced mental function but I'm going to stick with my earlier predictions .

You see I belong to a team , The Men in White , there is six of us . And a team who rides as a team will always beat an individual . John might beat us all but our combined finishing points should always beat his . So I've already won .

John Campbell might try and say that Brendo , Draino , Peco , Simmo are all part of his team .

Wrong John , you are the boss and the boss stands alone . That is your blessing ( pay packet ) and also your curse ( responsibility ) .

So I can't take bets on me beating John Campbell because I already have .

So ! No pressure at all John .

As for the unofficial , not really a race ---  just a joke betting market . Well Barry Bance is the favourite , that's my call . He will beat Mick Caine .

Tracy Middleton to beat Draino .

Muldoon won't show . 

Manildra group to beat Pacific National  .

Orange bike riders to beat everyone into Manildra .

That's right folks the scandal of the ride has emerged and guess what , many riders from Orange are doing the Dubbo to Manildra leg only . So they are going to bring their fresh legs to ruin the grandstand finish for the long haul riders . That sucks !

If Mick Cain rides in before Barry Bance , no problem ,  I might lose money but at least he is riding the whole route . We're going to have to adopt particular tactics for these blow ins .

We'll unleash Joe Raso .

The Pink Jersey And Yellow Jersey

Now let's make this clear the Mill2Mill is not a race . Do ya understand ?  It's not a competition .

Now try telling that to Barry Bance and Mick Cain . They are the frontrunners for the Pink Jersey and I don't think anything is going to stop them duking it out for first place honours .

Similarly the battle for the Yellow Jersey is alive and well and a couple of Manildra Flour employees will be trying to wrest it away from John Campbell .

Not many riders know this but there are other jerseys up for grabs .

The White one for the Men in White . Which we are going to share because we are all new riders representing the Millers and for once the Millers have kicked every other section into touch . No other section from Manildra has embraced the ride as we have . Go the Men in White !

There is also the Multicoloured Polka dot for the best rider who is cycling above expectations .

This last jersey is calculated by the following formula :

R = YR x CB / PR + AR 

Rider = Years of Riding ,times Cost of Bike ,divided by Position on Ride , plus age of Rider !

This gives me a chance of winning some sort of jersey which is as it should be ........

It is glaringly obvious that I'm no mathematician , maybe Jason Osbourne can come up with a more accurate formula that gives the outsiders some chance of winning a jersey . Just for a laugh ! I'm expecting lots of laughs on this ride by the way .

Beware The Ides Of March

If you ever learnt some Shakespeare at school then you might know about the Ides Of March which happen to fall on the 15th of that month . Coincidence or not , this date happens to be the start of the Mill2Mill ( we travel to Gunnedah on this day ) and there are some participants who are perhaps getting a bit nervous .

Muldoon isnt the worrying type but if he doesn't pull his finger out , Tracy Middleton is going to kick his arse . She is putting the work in and is rapidly cementing her status as an integral member of the Men in White . Gary Dougo is also on track , as long as he leaves the golf clubs alone he will beat the Doon also . The Packers won't like their man coming in behind several Millers so Muldoon get on your bike .

Paul Potter is also probably nervous but he has showed courage in even competing and deserves commendation for that . Jason Osbourne is a bit of a mystery but he has all the gear now including a beautiful new bike . No doubt he will be riding hard for the next six weeks .

It's hard finding the time to ride and John Campbell would find it harder than most being the General Manager of our company . He's a busy man which is why he is frantically cycling to and from work . He has his reputation to uphold and his Yellow Jersey to defend so there is a lot at stake .

The Disco Riders comprising Brendan Lea and Peco only ply their trade after dark . It's all flashing lights and boogie woogie but they will be ready . Draino is also a night person but not of the cycling variety . Whether he is ready to ride ..........?

Chris Gue is no worries , he is a born rider and has assured me that he will beat any management rider and the Jersey is his for the taking . Go you good thing Chris !

The other entrants to the Mill2Mill can huff and puff all they like but the real contest is for the Yellow Jersey which only an employee of Manildra Flour Mill can win . John has had it for many years and it's about time someone took him down . Someone French will do .

The Roll Call

When the bell goes to wake everyone up on the Mill2Mill there will be about sixty of us dragging our weary bodies out of bed . That is amazing and a credit to the organisers of the ride . 

We have riders from everywhere Manildra , Orange , Victoria and Scotland to name a few . We have big men , little men , and four or five women . We have personnel from Pacific National who this time cannot take the train . There are many other sponsors and thank you to them .

There is a charity aspect to this ride and if there is any one left after Tracy Middleton has got to them , I'll get some sponsorship .

All for a good cause so riders , get out there and raise some money . While you're doing that I'll be training , that's right because the Men In White are coming and you better watch out .

I'm starting to get excited about this event , I get to beat Muldoon and Draino and still have a beer with them afterwards , cheers boys , thanks for coming .

I get to ride with the Yellow Jersey ( arguing about the EBA ) , Muldoon ( debating politics ) , Ozzie ( discussing Motion Pictures ) , and many other people who I can talk flowers  , water , Scottish Independence ! Not to mention the underused rail lines of NSW .

Get rid of the trucks  so we can ride safer . Take the train !

Mooloolaba To Noosa

For those training for the forthcoming Mill2Mill , I am happy to say that I have got off my arse and got on my bike . In the most picturesque situation imaginable . The highlight of my holiday was certainly the well worn track from Mooloolaba to Noosa and back . Along David Low Way , hardly any lights , the ocean in close proximity .

Many many cyclists , all faster than me . Even the women overtook me , politely saying good morning as they sped by . Most of the riders had those bars on their bikes that made them more aerodynamic , triathlete style and boy did they motor .

The ghostrider will be pleased to know that I fell off my bike once in Noosa Junction in full view of the assorted tourists and shoppers but it didn't bother me . I'm going to be on the start line in Gunnedah and I suspect that the aptly named ghostrider will not .

Many other bike riders will be there and I am looking forward to meeting them all . Especially our intrepid Scottish 71 year old . Och awa the noo ( I don't care what you say Tony I read it in the Beano when I was a kid ). The sassenach is riding and I'm on track .

I understand Mick Cain is going to ride , one of the crack riders from Orange . I won't beat him but I'll sledge him over dinner just to show him who's the boss .

Yeah that's right I'm the ..............Err I mean John Campbell is the boss and don't you forget it !

Hydration and Nutrition By Muldoon

Now first up , I must emphasise the importance of hydration . You must have enough liquid intake to cope with the ride . Last year I used XXXX and I'm happy to tell you , it really does the job .

It's very important however that you get enough into you so I always recommend twenty schooners as a minimum . You can't hang about either , skull them as fast as you can before the pub closes .

The next step is nutrition and the best way to make sure you get an appetite is to follow the previous advice and drink twenty schooners . That way you are ready to devour 3 pies and 2 sausage rolls no problem .

So now you are ready I'll see you on the start line .

Hydration and Nutrition by Brendan Lea

Getting there!
Nutrition and Hydration.

By now it is apparant that the various cyclists around the Mill are getting pretty fit and have realised that big distances can be ridden.

However, one of the main strategies to remember on rides is "nutrition and hydration".  These are the corner stones that get you to the finish line.  I am not an expert in the field but I can give you a bit of an idea from the regime that a few of us follow.

Hydration is very very important.  Before commencing a ride in excess of 30km (or even less in hot weather) it is important to begin your hydration program an hour before you go.  This really is no more than ingesting around 8ml to 1kg of body weight of fluid over this hour.  This should see you topped up for the ride. 

If the weather is warm, the rule of thumb is to drink around 500ml to 700ml every 45 minutes or so.  A good idea is to take a drink when you see someone else doing so.  If you are thirsty you have become dehydrated.  If you stop for a comfort break and notice that your urine is dark in colour, you are dehydrated. (Berocca users excepted).  Do not let yourself get thirsty.  You will not be able to overcome the dehydration if you do.

There are many different "sports" drinks on the market.  It often gets down to personnel preferance for your choice. Drinks are often labelled "isotonic".  This basically means that the density of the drink is the same as the cells in your body and as such the fluid passes into your body at an increased rate to achieve a balance of hydrated cells.

Sports drinks also contain electrolytes which will prevent cramping.  Many provide energy as well.

Coke is also OK for the last part of a ride.  It has sugar (carbohydrate) and caffiene.  It's effects are fast but short lived.  It also rots out your teeth.

When you complete your ride, you should also drink around 500ml to 1000ml of fluid.  If you were thinking of using beer, you must remember the fluid should be about 15 deg celsius.  So for those lovers of warm English Ale your in luck. 

Eating is also important.  What is in your gut is the fuel for your engine.  The best fuel is carbohydrate, simple and complex.

If you can stomach plain boiled rice for breakfast, it is a great way to get fuelled.  Powerbars are also very good.  Breakfast cereals and other grain based products even muffins will also do the trick.  You do need some protein but it is often consumed in larger quantities in the evening as part of your recovery.  You may also eat a Power Bar 1/2 an hour before setting off.

When on the bike, products such as "GU" or other sports gels are good, as are cereal bars and trail packs of nuts and fruit.  Bananas are also excellent as they contain potassium. You need to top up as you go, particularly on long rides.

At the end of the ride after rehydration you should also make sure your evening meal has some carbs and protein.  As part of your rehydration you can buy special sports drings that have a high protein content.

This is just a quick guide which may be of some assistance. Hope it helps.

Tweak

Since we have several months before the Mill2Mill , we have an opportunity to finetune the Cyclo Sportif style of riding . We don't have to adopt it holus bolus .

For example perhaps when a team is 20km from the finish , the team is allowed to unleash their fast riders for an attempt at the finish line . The rest of the team concentrate on finishing or improving their position .

Also points can be worked out in this fashion ........if there are fifty riders , then the first rider gets fifty points , the second forty nine , third get 48 and the last rider gets one point . Second last gets two points , third last three points and so on ... 

It's a ladder with 50 places and each stage gives a rider a number of points even if they retire . Meaning the first rider to retire on a stage still gets a point . Because he finished fiftieth . The second last gets two points and so on . If a rider is stuffed that day and he retires he knows he will still earn points so he hangs on a bit longer so that maybe some other team loses riders .

Similarly . just say Barry Bance is getting multiple firsts for his team , it's not the end of the world for the other teams because a second and third will yield virtually the same points .

What do you reckon ? I think it's brilliant but I'm biased . 

Furthermore the Cycle Sportif is still in operation except with tweaks to make it more interesting . The team still has to stay together for a hundred and something kilometres . What happens during this time will determine what shape the team is in 20 km from the finish .

 Of course the points from each individual rider is translated to the team thereby creating the real league table . A team might get a third and fourth and a couple of thirties with minimal withdrawals and they might be the leading team . In this way everyone is worth a certain amount of points , everyone is worthy .

On that point I would like to say that in the interests of competition . Barry Bance   and John Campbell cannot be in the same team for this competion to be viable . They should be in seperate teams . Same with Brendan and Bill , they should be in teams that are suitably matched to the Men In White who are a ready made team . We should match up the teams to increase interest in the process .

Dirty Tricks

Well there we were at the start line for Manildra to Forbes when we realized that only The Men In White had come for the battle . All the experienced riders had wimped it except for Bill Peacock who , soon after  withdrew himself once he saw the blistering pace being generated by The Men In White .

No doubt he'll report back to the others who will then know we're deadly serious . So serious in fact that Peco's puncture had been planned the day before . No stone unturned and all that stuff .

The ride was changed to Eugowra and back , and so we set off , four MIW who had never rode 112km . The hills were a bit of a worry especially the ones on the way back . But you know what . we did it easy . Well perhaps not easy but we made it and we all felt great about it afterwards . 

There was a poignant moment afterwards at the Bowlo because Greasy looked at Gary Dougo incredously and said that he would never have imagined him doing anything remotely like that . 

Gary just beamed , he would never have imagined it either !  In fact Gary rode the last 40km in pain from a serious cramp but that didn't stop him finishing . No Sir !

I thought I put enough poison in his snakes to at least make him withdraw .

All told , the dirtiest trick of the day was played out at the beginning when the other riders called for me to lead us out of Manildra . I was chuffed , finally some recognition . I proudly sped in front of the rest , my chest puffed up , my bum in the air , when suddenly I was attacked by a feral magpie who left gouges in my helmet and a red sore right ear .

I could hear everyone behind me , pissing themselves laughing . I had been set up and had fallen for it hook line and sinker . The others sailed through unmolested .

I'm up for a laugh and I don't mind being the entertainment . It just made the whole thing better and after the ride had finished I felt like the Bushranger who had stolen the gold .  

Cyclo Sledge

The new system of Cyclo Sportif that is to be adopted for the Mill2MIll has now sunk in somewhat and the implications are being debated at length . 

No doubt some riders are pretty happy , especially the middle three type rider who now has less pressure to race . They can now relax and enjoy the adventure .

The top three type riders are smarting at the removal of kamikaze racing where they give everything to beat the next bloke . Their competitive instinct and intensive training is suddenly less important , instead they have to help and encourage and lead the weaker riders . I'm expecting a cancellation from Barry Bance .

The bottom three type of rider is hurting the most though at the prospect of them being the reason their team comes last or some such scenario . One bloke has already warned his teammates that smart comments relating to his performance will not be treated lightly .

For a couple of riders the prospect of a friendly charity ride has now changed . There is more pressure on them to perform to a certain level .

In spite of these reservations however , the idea of this Sporting Cycling is good , It keeps everyone together for a start . Otherwise you have riders strung out all over the route . A logistical nightmare and a safety hazard . Like this everyone is looked after and nobody is left on their own especially at breakdowns . The event becomes less about testorone and more about character and altruism .

Also it will be more fun because we will be in close proximity to our teammates and we will also be close to the other teams . An ideal time for sustained and coordinated sledging of the team you are passing or being left behind by .

As a guide for prospective riders , it is best to know what kind of sledges are best used in a particular situation . For the Men in White , we will be holding seminars to learn the fine art of insult while sweating buckets .

The new system requires a team with a strong leadership , two or three riders who are strong in fitness and decision making . The Men in White have a natural leader in Gary Douglas who has rallied his troops , makes the calls to get everyone to ride . Encourages his weaker riders to come out riding and generally is doing the job . Not surprising as he is used to leading and I will be happy to ride in his team .

For me the new regime means I have to forsake my ambition of beating the Yellow Jersey into Manildra on the last day of the ride . I've had to cancel all that EPO coming from Europe and also the two litres of calves blood coming from Brookvale .

You're lucky John Campbell .....and by the way I know this is all a massive conspiracy to stop me beating you .

I'll go along with it this time .........!

Actually to tell the truth it's hard to find the time to ride and sometimes the only window of opportunity to get out and ride might not be when you are feeling like it . So as a motivational tool to get me out riding I like to watch Lance Armstrong on Youtube . Alpe De Huez 2001 when Lance puts the field to the sword is a standout for me .

It is set to music , Fat Boy Slim , and everytime Lance stands up and attacks , the music beats faster . Brilliantly inspirational like the man himself .

In the same section of Youtube there are a number of Nike ads featuring Armstrong that are also good value particularly the " What are you on " one where he throws all allegations back at his accusers . it made me think maybe he was clean after all . 

As a newcomer to cycling I never fully appreciated the power of Lance Armstrong . This next Tour de France is going to be absolutely huge . Not to mention the forthcoming Tour of Adelaide . Why don't we have a prize where the winner of the Mill2Mill gets to go to Adelaide . 

It would be a motivator for riders to do the right thing by their team as it would be the only way they could win the Maglia Rosso .

Brendan Lea Sets The Play

Dear All,

We have been looking at the organisation of the Moule to Moule.

The idea that we have is to run the ride as "cyclo sportif". 

Cyclo Sportif is a system where you ride in teams of a minimum of 5 and maximum of 9.  Due to our limited numbers we are looking at a maximum of 8.

The idea is that you  must ride as a team.  The strongest riders must support the weakest riders.  That includes punctures and breakdowns.  The team must not split up.  The idea is the event is not about winning but about teamwork and achievement.

For the Mill to Mill we are thinking that there would be awards each day for 2 catagories. "La Muet" for the person who does something dopey or silly on the leg, from taking the wrong turn to riding with the wrong team or making a silly statement etc.

The second jersey would be the "La Courageux" for a team member who shows the most courage during the ride.  A team of adjudicators comprising the team captains would make the decision on both counts.

The leaders jersey would not be allocated until the last evening.  The system for grading in what could be called the general classification is yet to be worked out.  Needless to say the wearer of the pink jersey would need to defend it on the last day.  No namby pamby last day ride like the Tour De France.

Below is an excerpt from the Perth Cyclo Sport Club web site that sets out a bit more about the spirit and operation of cyclo sportif.

Ode to Elvis- The Cyclo Sportif Spirit

I have had the privilege of participating in almost every Cyclo Sportif event since its inception. The courses have been varied and so have the members in my team. My form has varied over the time which has resulted in me participating in the event and finding during the ride that I am in the strongest 3, the middle 3 and at times unfortunately (for me) the weakest 3. I much prefer it when I am the strongest 3 however this is not always possible. It becomes a very hard day when I am the weakest link. Flogging my guts out just to stick with my team, being tempted to pull out through injury or some other excuse. Questioning my reasons for putting myself through this agony. The ride taking an eternity to finish. At the meal and the presentations those memories quickly fade and the talk switches to the next event.

Without doubt the best rides I have ever had, whether it be in the strongest 3, the middle 3 or the weakest 3 have been when there has been an absolute commitment by every member in the team to stick together at all times, no matter what, during the ride. The group energy and camaraderie at the finish line and the meal afterwards is the best reward of all and is what team sport is all about. During the ride, when the team is in beautiful harmony, sharing turns, in perfect formation, riding smoothly, it’s an exhilarating moment. Now that is what I call an Elvis moment. Cyclo Sportif events are special because it is a team challenge with your friends. The team is only ever as good as the weakest riders in it and when the strongest riders leave them behind, that magic that makes Cyclo Sportif so special fades and can even disappear. It also becomes more dangerous because cyclists are scattered across the field.
How can my team have more Elvis moments

Appoint a team captain who calls the shots during the ride. He will logically be one of your strongest 3 riders.
Make an absolute commitment within the team that you will stick within 25 metres of each other at all times during the ride. The stronger members can assist the others by smooth tempo riding in front of others (or whatever else they want to do, however it needs to be safe).
Have a clear understanding before the ride as to how you will rotate at the front to share the workload.
Communicate what you are doing and especially clearly alert others to potential dangers
Encourage each other during the ride. It helps bond the team.
If someone is struggling, the others (especially the strong ones) should discuss a simple plan to help the person.
The person struggling needs to communicate back as to how much assistance they need and the speed they are capable of as the event progresses ( yelling faster/slower is a good start). Most importantly they should not feel bad about their circumstance or be made to feel bad about it. Every team has their weakest rider. This IS what Cyclo Sportif is all about!!!!!!! GO ELVIS

Subterfuge

The deceit is all encompassing . Every rider is busy playing themselves down . It is the favoured tactic so far .

From  Chris Gue secretly riding 80km in one go and then pretending he only went to the Monument and back . And ' yours truly " riding to Orange to Molong and back ....... and then insisting my wife had picked me up from there . Anything to deflect any sort of fitness and form .

We've had Brendan plead his body is not good enough for his fabulous bike . Also John Campbell the current holder of the Yellow Jersey is worried about his form  . Yeah right !

Paul Potter reckons his bike hasn't arrived . For all we know he might already be tearing up the bitumen . Anything is possible in the current climate of suspicion .

Gary Douglas as expected is excelling at this sort of stuff . He stays at the back of the peloton pretending he's only there for the comaraderie when in fact he's intent on vapourizing the opposition . He's keeping his powder dry . 

The only person talking themselves up is the Ghost Rider . I've decided to follow the example of the Ghostly One and talk myself up a bit . 

I hereby declare that I am going to smoke John Campbell's arse .  Furthermore I'm going to leave Brendan Lea gasping in my wake .

Gue and Dougo are my domestiques .  

Ozzie is road kill . Paul Potter and Spongy are sacrificial lambs to the slaughter .

Muldoon can fix my punctures . Draino can pump up my tyres . Literally and metaphorically .

One rider I am scared of is Barry Bance because I have it on good authority that he is a total gun . A shotgun , a Gatling gun no less . He is officially the favourite for the tour . Unless he wants to follow everyone else and try and talk himself down . To do that he would have to place a comment !

Another rider I fear is Bill Peacock because he is Mr Cycling and is an icon of the sport in Manildra and it would be fitting were he to win .To combat him I am drinking as much of his water as I can when I am on shift . This hydrates me and also makes him busier with his business with less time for riding . I have a strategy for all my opponents .  

Anyway the tour is already virtually up to it's capacity of fifty riders . Spongy snuck in just in time . There will be a Tafe team but no other Manildra personnel except for us from the Mill . And Barry .

The Chaff reckons the Yellow Jersey must be only worn by a MIll employee . ( My account number is in the office somewhere ) . It is essential for the reason that we are never going to get the nickname to stick unless John wins . 

Sponsorship forms will be available soon and then it will be incumbent on the participants to drum up some pledges . You know , tell your neighbor you're cycling from Gunnedah to Manildra and then when they guffaw , bet them twenty bucks you can make it . A few of those and you'll be cooking with gas .

Remember this is also a charity ride . Line up your sponsors because we want this ride to mean something . We want to have a good time but we can help others at the same time . So let us use a similar amount of energy getting sponsors as we are at talking ourselves down .

Le Mille Au Mille

Nous allons pour Le Tour . Les participants seem to swelling with every week that goes by . Spongy has thrown his hat into the ring . We now have the two best nicknames riding , three if we include John's .

The main news though is Tracy Middleton who is showing the way for the other girls who have expressed an interest but have yet to show any substance to their words . Tracy on the other hand has got a bike , got the gear and most importantly is clocking up the miles .

She truly is a Man in White !

Come on you women !!! I'm talking about you , Lucy , Ashlee and Crystal .............

While we're waiting for the girls to put on their make up . let's run the ruler over the Men in White team who are approaching the tour with the same professional attitude that they mill with .

Paul Potter shows so much confidence he pays up front for a bike and when the company fail to deliver they upgrade him to super dooper bike .

Jason Osborne is not satisfied with 57km on his mountain bike . He puts a deposit on a racer . Who says we're not serious ? The Men in White are coming !

What I mean to say is Dougo and Gue are coming . Really fast actually , much faster than I expected . I'm still doing the Coffee shop run . Ristretto to Bill's Beans flat out sprint and then DNA and Cafe Latte . After I've stopped hyperventilating , I hit the beer . I'm building up slowly .  

Strange Days

Strange days in the Control Room . The place is alive with conversations about cadence and cranks . We can't help ourselves . It's much more fun than working .

It's driving Scott Thornberry crazy . Wilbur Too . Not to mention Mustad who has to put up with three of us on the same shift nattering about cycling . So to shift the focus somewhat , Scott and Wilbur are taking on Mustad and Mick Reyno ( the crusty semen ) in a grudge match on the golf course .

The betting has been furious and if the crusties prevail then Gary is out of pocket . If Wilbur brings his A game then Gue , Allcorn and myself have to pay up .

Onto the real business.......

Now that The Men In White have a Team , the serious business of getting fit and technically proficient is well underway . The latest instalment brought Chris Gue , Jason Osborne and I together for a crack at a 45 km ride . We blitzed it and special mention to Jason who is a big man on a mountain bike , he showed plenty of heart and proved he is going to be an effective member of the team .

Chris is the real deal no doubt about it , he looks the goods on the bike and more importantly he looks a million dollars with all the gear .

What about me ? Well I went all right except for a wardrobe malfunction which seemed to amuse the guys no end . I did find it funny but just not as funny as they obviously did . They were doubled over .

I had put on my new nicks the wrong way round . No wonder it was really comfy at the front . We were in the middle of nowhere when we noticed so I couldn't change . It kept the others amused all the way home .

The Bandwagon Rolls On

As the preliminary scouting for The Tour begins , word is that about fifty riders will be able to take part . This is quite a sizeable number from a logistical point of view and is going to take a fair bit of organisation . Where are we going to get the other riders ? Are Head office or Nowra going to participate ? Is Indonesia ?

I hope they do plus also Gunnedah and Narrendera . In fact it is worth throwing out the challenge to these establishments to give them plenty of time to put forward some willing personnel who are game to suffer for a good cause .

They have to be quick because Manildra are busy climbing on the bandwagon and not only do we have a robust Men In White team but we are beginning to get the makings of a Womens team who could provide the icing on the cake as far as the Mill to Mill is concerned .

Tracy Middleton has taken the plunge and there is word of Lucy , Crystal and Ashlee all contemplating the challenge  .Great stuff ! The more the better , I mean the more women the less chance of me placing last  ! I'm joking OK . There's nobody more equal opportunity than me . 

This is hot on the heels of Gary Douglas getting his bike and instantly churning out 30 Km without blinking an eye . Chris Gue is rapt because now the pressure is now shared and he is no longer expected to carry the flag .

Don't look at me , I'm not doing it , this was all a joke . You guys just take things too seriously . Here I am going round Orange like I'm on a picnic and Gue and Dougo are burning off the bitumen around the Central West . Talk about competitive or what !

In fact Gary has enlisted the best coaching team in Manildra . His second ride was monitored by Brendan and Bill Peacock . They are obviously targeting him for the Management team . Waste of time , he's a Man In White through and through .

A slight change of subject because there are some jokes flying around about my culpability in the whole interest around the Tour . You know stuff like " what have you got me into ? " . All good natured and part of the banter that is going on . I love all that stuff .

It is wise however to note that cycling on the road can be dangerous and I would hate for someone to get seriously hurt when I have championed the whole idea .

For example I have life insurance and also income protection that were in place long before any of this came up . I urge all participants to make sure they are adequately covered for their adventures on the road .

Also remember you have equal right to the road as any vehicle , don't get pushed off the verge or squashed against a fence but don't take silly risks either . Most car drivers are great but some are idiots . Don't play chicken with the idiots . 

Zen And The Art Of Bicycle Maintenance

As any Miller will tell you , I'm not the best at fixing things so when I had my first puncture today , it was panic stations . I was on Racecourse road and the houses near where I had come to an abrupt halt seemed to contain an inordinate number of big barking dogs . This only added to the tension as I struggled with the inner tube .

I eventually rang my wife to come and get me and I fixed the puncture at home . I also had to reattach the chain which had come of so I was quickly learning the basics of bike troubleshooting  . Which is pretty important when you think about it . I can just picture me wrestling with some technical problem with the bike while the rest of the Tour are heading off into the distance . 

In fact I am driving David Shea crazy , he is a friend of mine who works in the Bike Shop and I have been in a number of times with problems that are quite minor it must be said .

It's cool because I'm a Man in White and we are all over this . My fellow white shirts have astounded me with their purchases of Scott and Fuji bikes that put my jalopy to shame . It's lucky that I'm a superior athlete and I can overcome my equipment limitations . More importantly however we are in the same team . The Men in White are a bona fide team now with five riders .

Tracy Middleton has again showed us she is a trailblazer . The first female Miller and now the first woman to put her hand up for the Mill to Mill , whose charity incidentally is the Jane McGrath foundation . So well done Tracy and good luck with your riding .

Now cop this , Chris Gue our gun recruit has ridden 39km on his first ride . He did this without holding onto his handlebars for most of the way . No wonder the management are worried .

Picture Chagall of France in the Union , the great French forward ........well that's what Gary Douglas brings to the team . All aggression and motivation . The Killer has his bike !

And guess what it's blue and white ! The other day I was in the bike shop pestering the guys in there when one of them drew my attention to a fancy looking machine belonging to a certain Gary Dougo . Well I couldn't resist the opportunity when the guys were called up the front . I scratched " go the Bulldogs " on the underside of Gary's bike . He won't mind . He can take a joke .  

Big Jason Osborne has also taken up the challenge and he plans to convert his Scott mountain bike to more road friendly tyres and stuff . He also hit the road and is busy getting fit . His secret weapon is his home trainer where he clocks up the Kms in the warmth of his lounge room .

The Men In White Are Coming .

That's right , we are coming and you better watch out !  I advise the holder of the Yellow Jersey to up his training because it won't look good if one of the Men In White takes the coveted prize in a discipline that our General Manager is so proficient . Also Brendan Lea should beware of a rider with a fifty dollar bike beating his Rolls Royce of a machine . We've got Draino covered . No offense Draino but we're riding and you are in our sights .

Muldoon is going to be isolated and we're going to triple team him . Ben Allcorn has already admitted defeat and will only ride if Gary Douglas beats him in three holes out of nine . In golf that is !

So the packers and the workshop are already cactus by the look of it . We've only got to knock off the management and we're sweet .

My aim is for massive participation from the Men in White. So large that the Mill is brought to a shuddering halt . The management would then realize the value of the white shirts .

So Tracy and  Paul hitch yourselves to the bandwagon , Tracy we'll make you an honorary man for this trip so that you don't feel left out . Paul there are many dubious observers out there punting you won't make it . Prove them wrong Mate .

Mustard reconsider your comfort zone and be really extreme and test your endurance . 

Roughly half a dozen Millers could make the trip without leaving the Mill short staffed .

So our secret weapon Gue is first ,  then Ozzie and myself  , our leader Gary Douglas and possibly Tracy and Paul . Mustad and Mick Reynolds are the ones to work on .

The Starting Line

Chris Gue , Patrick Cost-Chretien , Jason Osborne and Gary Douglas who is about to break the start .

Sastre

Well so Cadel Evans has not won and tonight the riders cruise into Paris with Sastre the winner and Cadel second . It is a magnificent effort from Evans to come second again . He was on his own virtually .

Because he did not win , technically I could renege on my promise to take up cycling but it's too late , I've got a bike , I 've had four rides by myself and I am well and truly hooked . It is bloody good fun , even on my own .

I generally take the dog ( who used to be called  Sonny Bill ) for a run behind the bike . I use that as a warm up and when he is puffed I drop him home and off I go . I haven't been outside Orange yet , but I've crisscrossed it several times . No punctures yet , I'm getting used to the handling , the gears , the body position . The brakes and the traffic of course . And the nameless dogs !

I saw a friend of mine outside Bills Beans the other day , he had just come back from a ride , he's a hotshot lawyer and he had all the gear let me tell you . He urged me to join his riding group one Sunday .When I explained to him that I tuck my trackies into my socks and that I spew going uphill he rescinded the invitation .

Anyway the main game is getting to the start line for the MIll to Mill and to that end at least I am on the way . I'm sweating on Chris Gue to take the plunge , I really want him to be there . Ozzie is training but so far it's the indoor variety . I'm not sure about Gary Douglas he seems to have cold feet now . I'm hoping Tracy Middleton embraces the whole idea , we need women competitors . Also another possible is Paul Potter , c'mon Paul . Geoff Grant would be unreal but he will be busy with his boats on Lake Canobolas at that time of year .

We need a big Men in White team so that we can vie for the winning title . I think a consistent team should be able to beat the hot shot riders with a point system that rewards teamwork . For example let's say John Campbell comes first ( no pressure John ) but the rest of his team is way back . But the Men in White ( including Tracy ) arrive in the middle of the field intact and so beat John's team .

Brendan will have some ideas on this and also be able to tell us , how they worked it in Perth . It will be a charity ride but there should still be some competive component . For fun you know .

Remember Sastre will win because he has a better team than Cadel . And I think this forthcoming adventure should also emphasise the team ethic . For example I think Bill Peacock ( who I don't know ) and Dan Simmons ( I've met once ) would make great Men in White .

Who is Barry Bance ?

John Campbell holds the Yellow Jersey  . The Chaff invented it last year ..

However there is some argument  that a certain Barry Bance is the real " Maillot " . Perusing the commentary from last year , it seems this may be a possibility . But before everyone gets excited , Who exactly is Barry ?

Apparently he runs the sales team for the State . That's pretty easy , We make the best flour so Barry Bance must have a pretty easy job . Plenty of time for training as it were .

 Our John on the other hand is non stop , foot to the floor -  flour production with not much time for training . ( my account number is in the office somewhere )

I've just started my training , I've had two sessions , the first I rode round the block and the second I pushed it and went round twice . It's a great way to exercise the dog that's for sure , he's knackered and  I'm in traction .

Not much sympathy from the Missus . We have a new kitchen waiting to be painted and she is not impressed her painter is morphing into Eddie Merckx . Not that I'm comparing myself with The great Eddie , he's from Belgium  >  They live and breathe cycling there and  --oh yeah -- I can't ride at all !

But I've started , putting my money where my mouth is , so to speak and talking about money .........My God this is the sport of kings , I could have bought a racehorse .

One good thing though , I've had to cut down my drinking and smoking . Riding through the streets trying to balance a beer and a fag is way harder than I thought .

Anyway Barry make a comment on behalf of Head Office who have not done so yet . Give us the goss on how John's temper holds up in the heat of battle . Is he a Polka Dot or a Greenie or is he really the Yellow Jersey ?  And will Head Office provide a team for Gunnedah ?

Gunnedah to Manildra

Now imagine for a moment it's Mar O9 . Le Pink Tour is in it's final stages from Wello to Manildra and Barry Bance and John Campbell are neck and neck at the front . The Peloton has been shredded by the sheer pace of the last stage . Who's got that little bit extra ?

Well it's John Campbell because The Men In White arrive en masse to propell The Yellow Jersey  to victory . Of course the MIW extract a hefty pay rise out of JC a few kilometres from the finish line and everybodys happy .

So I'm dreaming ......... but can you imagine all the little rivalries between sections , between Mills , between supervisors and staff , between individuals . All amazing fun .

Anyway here is most of Brendan's post so everyone reads it . Sometimes comments get overlooked .

Current thinking for the route is,
Day 1, Gunnedah to Coolah, 126km.
Day 2, Coolah to Mudgee, A option, 109km, B option, 71km.
Day 3, Mudgee to Mudgee, A option, 80km, B option, suit yourself
Day 4, Mudgee to Dubbo, A option, 138km, B option, 72km.
Day 5, Dubbo to Manildra, A option, 193km, B option, 137km.

It is planned to raise money for the Jane McGrath Breast Cancer foundation and the local Lions Clubs.  This may mean that the leader will in fact have to wear a "pink" jersey (as per the Giro de Italia).

Pressure may need to be bought on our best "Lead Out Man", Big Bike Allcorn to get him back in the team.  He is sorley missed.

It is great to see that the Men in White are up to the challenge.  They will be a very hard team to crack, given their combination of "Guts and Guile".  Muldoon will have to work hard to get his packing team together for this, if he hopes not to be embarrassed by the new kids on the block.

Also given that the main charity would be for Breast Cancer research, we really need some females to join the happy throng.

In the meantime there will be plenty of local "Tours" to help get into nick and to learn the tricks of riding in a "Peleton".

Coming up of course is the Mulga Bill bike ride from Cumnock to Yeoval. Only 20 odd Kms but fun.  Following this will be some overnight events from Manildra to Forbes (cycling return optional).  This is a great event.  Lots of fun to be had in Forbes.  There are also planned trips to Dubbo, plus other weekend day runs to Cargo, Cumnock and even Molong to name a few.

Also most afternoons there are rides of between 20 and 40 kms. If you are interested, give me  call on 204.  Remember, this is not limited to Mill staff, so if you have any interested friends, bring them along. 

On all of these rides there is support for all levels of fitness.

I can't wait to see The so called Men In White eat my dust .

........................................................................................

Ok so Brendan didn't write the last sentence but that's what he thinks . I'm telling you !

Look life's too short , make up a rivalry , get a bike ...let's do something different .

 

Le Tour

Le Tour est bien . Monsiur Evans c'est le "Yellow Jersey" . Je suis ecstatique " C'mon Cadel ".

One problem is I promised to take up riding if Cadel Evans won the Tour de France so now he is leading I have gone and put 100 bucks deposit on the cheapest bike in Orange . I'm committed .

I'm not going to beat John Campbell just yet but I'm going to leave Gary Douglas in my wake in the Tour de Manildra , just watch me . And just to make sure I'm successful I've gone and bought the only bike in our size in Orange .  Gary either has to wait untill August for new models or pay through the nose for a more expensive bike . Either way I'm ahead which is the main thing .

Just to let everyone know ........... The Men in White are coming ,,,,,,, Ozzie already armed with a bike , just waiting for the rest of us to take the plunge . That's why he hasn't been training because he's waiting for the rest of us .  

Gue is the dangerman , being  French , cycling is in his blood and he is as fit as a fiddle so I fear him the most . The French Cycling Association  have implored him to uphold " L' Honneur Francais " in the forthcoming Manildra Tour . Will he be there ?

Regarding that , I think John Campbell should go ahead with his breakaway tour , make it more  friendly ,than the previous one , more local , more Manildra . Use the Draino formula which consists of 90 km a day with intraveneous beer afterwards . I'll be in that one .

Gunnedah to Nowra ......is what is rumoured . That's fine as long as we go through Kings Cross on the way and remember what happens on the tour stays on the tour . 

As a footnote can I say how let down I feel by one of our crew members who thinks he is Mustard , French Mustard but he doesn't rate this challenge for the Men in White . He's into extreme sports but he doesn't see the toughness in the Tour de France . He can shoot an animal or be flash on a motor bike but he can't run a hundred metres or ride home from work without vomiting . He is more like English Mustard . Harden up mate and follow your team in the mission to get the Yellow Jersey !

Brendan shows his form

Draino hides his legs

Where The Wind Blows

The thing about Perth is it can be a really windy place and when I used to go to the beach there , I was always struck by how many windsurfers there were just beyond the surf . Once the Fremantle Doctor came in , it really got blowy .

It appears this same wind has played havoc with our intrepid bunch of cyclists who mostly encountered headwinds so that 50km would feel like 100 and so on . The final 240km must have been an arsebreaker but in spite of this , the guys put in a manly effort . One thing is certain John Campbell blitzed the yellow jersey and now is in no position to argue against the adoption of the aforementioned nickname .

Muldoon seemed pretty happy with his efforts but Draino did it tough . Brendan will post more details soon . Is anybody out there ready to have a go next year assuming the MMRT doesn't get busted for performance enhancing drugs . I mean how else does Muldoon cycle 240 km in one day ? Also I wonder whether John prefers EPO or a complete blood transfusion .

Small Update

"It's a punish mate" ! Those were Muldoon's words to me when he called to update us less than halfway throught the tour . It appears the boys might be struggling a bit with most of our team running last . Muldoon admitted he was the last rider over the line yesterday . There is not much else I know but I will talk to the riders when they come back so we can get the high and low lights of the tour .

Margaret River here we come !

It is two weeks before the start of the tour . We have not been given any information on the state of proceedings but it is safe to assume that John will wear the yellow jersey  and Brendon will not challenge unless forced to by circumstances . Draino will be too busy avoiding cameras to make a tilt for the lead . Muldoon , Draino and Allcorn are taking an unscheduled rest day that involves imbibing copious amounts of Margaret River wine . Tell us it isn't so Draino ? The dark horse is Bordo by the way if you're a betting man . He seemed quietly confident when I saw him last .

To keep abreast of proceedings we need the guys to update us while on the tour . Emails and calls that sort of thing . We need to know what's going on . That way we can contribute to the cause while feeling involved . After all it is our sterling efforts that are subsidising the whole affair , not that I'm bitter or anything , I just wish I could ride a bike and I could be in Margaret River too .

Instead I shall give a few dollars to the charity involved , one that helps disadvantaged young people and I urge everyone to do the same . I know what you're thinking , why should I give money when these guys are having what amounts to a paid holiday in Margaret River . Well I say to those non believers , wait till you see the photos of the guys doing the hard yards ! Then will you give ? Ok Deal .

Manildra Mills Riding Team (MMRT)

Brendan Lea has posted a comment in the Health and Fitness category and everybody should read it . It dispels the rumour that MMRT are going on a tour of the wineries and pubs of Margaret River . They are going to have to work their butts off (literally) and I for one feel better already . In fact it is for a very worthy cause and deserves support . The Chaff will donate for sure , how much depends on the degree of suffering the team endures . The Chaff invites members of the team to email photos and commentary to the website during the tour . That way readers can donate according to what they see , for example a photo of the team all kitted up ready to go is worth a few dollars . Ben Allcorn struggling up a hill , in obvious pain is worth much more . An image of the guys scattered all over the road because a dog has run out in front of them , well I'll take out a second mortgage for that one !

My email is patrick.cost@bigpond.com . The nominated photographer of the team can send photos here or if that proves too difficult can put commentary on the Chaff . That way we can follow the tour from this end . That would be fun for us and it would help drum up donations .